I admire the fathers who play a major part in their children’s’ lives. My heart smiles when I see the father dropping off his child at daycare. As he turns away, the child cries and he turns around, gives the child a hug and a kiss then comforts the child by saying, “Daddy will be back as soon as I get off work.” My heart smiles as I see fathers at gymnastic classes watching their children through the window. They are smiling and waving at their children along with blowing kisses. Many of them stand there with their phone taking pictures of their children. My heart smiles as I see fathers walking with their children in stores, sitting with their children at doctor appointments and running around with them at the park. I can recall a conversation I had with one father at gymnastics. I told him I admired how he brings his daughter to gymnastics. His response was, “Oh, I don’t mind. My wife needs her rest just like I do. Plus, I love spending one on one time with my daughter.” Those words went straight pass my heart and touched my soul. But at the same time, I developed a regret on my behalf because my children didn’t have that; they still don’t….not from an earthly father.
After I start having children, I experience the distorted world of fatherhood through the fathers of my children. I come from the world where fathers go days without talking or seeing their children without one bit of remorse. I come from the world where fathers think a mother is asking for a million dollars when her only request was for her child to have new shoes. I come from the world where fathers allow their children to see them with a different woman every other month. I come from the world where fathers take anger out on their children when they are upset with their mothers. I come from the world where fathers do just enough so they won’t get stuck with child support. I come from the world where fathers walk the role as a “father” just for the applause of others and not for the love of their children. I come from the world where fathers deny that a child is his knowing that the child is. I come from the world where fathers deprive their own children of knowing who their brothers and sisters are. I come from the world where fathers think that their “cash” to their children is a definition of their “love” for their children. I come from the world where fathers claims their working hours and need for sleep is the reason why there is a lack of quality time with their children. I come from the world where fathers use vulgar profanity as a method of discipline for their children. This is the world that I come from.
But God has shown me that no matter what world I come from, I am in His World now. My children are in His World. “God is A Father to the Fatherless” (Psalm 68:5). My children are in the palm of God’s Hand. God told me that every time I get up and get my children ready for school or daycare, He is there helping me with them. God told me that every time I drop them off, He is there with me and He stays with them all during the day. Every gymnastics and karate session my children participate in, God says that He is there watching and smiling on them. When I tend to get worried about the needs of my children, God tells me not to worry because He will provide. God told me that He is Child Support. On days when my children get irritable, God says He is the hand that comforts them. He runs with them while the play. He lays beside them and watch over them while they are asleep. God says He is their Father. I long for the support of my children’s’ earthly fathers, but I don’t have that. But when think of how good The Heavenly Father is to both me and my children, a feeling of comfort and assurance comes over me. And if it is meant for an earthly father to be in my children’s lives, I know that The Heavenly Father will make that possible and the man God chooses will love my children more than life itself. –S.L.M.